I am the Something-or-Other of Junk Jewelry.  Really.  I have a rhinestone tiara and everything.

I used to wear good stuff.  Really good stuff.

My dad was in Asia a lot having been a career Marine.  He would buy my mom and me exquisite jewelry. A lot of it was pearls — really nice ones in heavy gold, white, and yellow, settings. 

Our house was robbed in the early 80s when the price of gold went way up. The guy who did it didn’t know what he was doing.  Nonetheless, he managed to get all of my good stuff and most of my mom’s.  He left behind everything he didn’t think was gold.  The pearl ring my father gave me, some of my mom’s pearls, and the exquisite very valuable jade that is my mother’s.

I will inherit the jade.  I’ll probably be too scared of losing it or something to wear out.

As the years progressed, my jewelry box was replenished.

Nine years ago when my partner was in the hospital dying, the lowlife down the road stole everything yellow gold.  Not thinking the silvery stuff was any good.  Hence, I managed to keep my great-grandmother’s pearls and the pearl ring my father gave me.  Everything else was gone including my engagement ring and wedding ring – both heavy yellow gold. The engagement ring was from one of my many fiancés during the late 70s and early 80s.  It was the only one I kept.  Precious topaz – absolutely breathtaking.

I know the Lowlife Down the Road did it, but I can’t prove it. 

From then on, I have built a collection of pure junk.  I am right fond of bracelets these days.  I wear them in matching pairs one on each wrist.  Wonder Woman!

My partner bought me a few good southwest Native American pieces – a breathtaking beaded necklace I am too scared to wear – and some Mexican silver with lapis lazuli.  Ditto.  There are some other pieces he gave me.  For a while, I was into dragonfly broaches.  I have many.  Since I seldom wear anything with a lapel these days, the only suitable place for a broach, in my opinion, they don’t get out much.

Necklaces and earrings, great big gaudy things.  Matching of course with bracelets that at the very least complement if not exactly match.

I can be a spectacle. Iris Apfel is my role model.

She is the Queen of Junk Jewelry, but I suspect hers is not junk.  That makes me, I guess, the Lady-in-Waiting?  Duchess? Princess? I do have the tiara after all. Flaunt it if you got it is my motto.  And flaunt I do though I try to do so with style and pizzazz with a soupcon of flare.

I am the Something-or-Other of Junk Jewelry.